The First Visit - Kishore's Mom comes to the US
This summer Kishore and I had a visit from a very special guest. Kishore's Mom...Amma.
I had heard a lot about her and I won't lie I was a little worried...who wouldn't be!? I mean we'd communicated a few times via Facetime but this would be different...What if she didn't like me, what if there was a lot of awkward silences and misunderstandings (we don't speak the same languages), what if she didn't like my cooking!? So many questions!!!
Kishore told me REPEATEDLY not to worry that everything would be fine, usually that helps but this time it didn't, after all the relationship between Mother and Son is very different then that of Mother-in-law and Daughter-in-law.
After all, I grew up listening to oldies and this was always a staple on WCBS-FM NY...
What if there was some truth in the song? The "what if's" were really starting to pile up, so I decided to go to my Mom and Aunt and ask them how they approached their Mother-in-laws.
They both gave me good advice; that the most important things to remember are:
A) Be yourself (Don't pretend to be someone you're not, it will only cause problems later.)
B) Mutual Respect (You have to give it to get it), and
C) Understand that differences don't automatically mean problems, if anything it's a great chance for learning.
This advice is so simple and so true, and it helped me to put things into perspective.
So the day came when we went to pick her up from the airport, I was nervous but excited at the same time. The wait felt like forever, then suddenly Kishore excitedly said with a big smile on his face, "She's here! That's Amma! Let me take a pic!" She said, "Hi" and gave us both hugs, it was the warm greeting I was truly hoping for.
Please allow me to introduce....Amma!